Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Am I The Only One?

Is it just me, or is adoption scary? I mean, here we are planning to add one or two little ones to our family that come from another culture & continent. After all our hard work, prayers & tears, I am now feeling overwhelmed by what we are planning. Talk about an emotional roller coaster!

I have so many questions. Like...how do we discipline & yet bond at the same time, how do we balance the way we treat our bio. son with the way we will treat our new kid(s), because I know they'll have to be different in some ways, at least for awhile...how do we handle the fact that our son already has toys & the new little pumpkin will either have lots too (that will have to be new) & will make our bio. son jealous, or not have as many & that won't be good either...how will the attachment process go...how will I be strong enough physically to keep up, to handle the sleep deprivation ...and on and on...!

At the end of my current "Questioning/Panic Attack" I realize that I felt a bit like this the first time around - when I was pregnant with Mark. I just take my responsibilities seriously & get a little too conscientious/stressed sometimes. I also realize that yes, I am in way over my head and that it's OK. It's probably right where God wants me to be. I am very aware of my utter reliance on Him!

Anyone else gone through these feelings?

4 comments:

Holly said...

I would be scared too!! At least the process is SLOW, so you will have lots of time to "prepare" before your babes will join you....
Praying for you....fight only to stay in HIS PEACE! XOXOX

Patty said...

Thanks Holly! I sooooo appreciate your encouragement!
Love you sis!

Kristin said...

I think you're in a great place, Patty! Honestly I didn't give a lot of thought to the "scary" stuff, and it kinda caught me by surprise. Valid questions. We deal with the "stuff" issue every day (thankfully we already shared most things here). Just today one of the new kids was frustrated because one of the old kids took away a toy (that had gotten broken a bit). This new kid had no idea it belonged to the old kid (it had been a Christmas gift last year). Everyone played it for days equally, but only when it wasn't being taken care of did the old kid step in and claim it in order to protect it. Strange to figure it all out. My old kids all have stuff they have accumulated over years. My new kids have some stuff and are always getting more, but... Things are just different.


Bottom line - you KNOW you are in the center of God's will and He WILL see you all through, for the good!!!!!!!!!!

Praying for peace for you tonight!
Kristin

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